


kant’s theory of utilitarianism

by shipcat



Series: Assorted Tumblr and Discord Drabbles [16]
Category: Naruto
Genre: 31 Days of ThatShipCat, Chronic Illness (referenced), Drabble, F/M, Getting to Know Each Other, Mostly humorous tho, kitty also said messy!Karin rights, kitty said skirt!karin rights, medical consent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-18
Updated: 2020-01-18
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:22:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22307101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shipcat/pseuds/shipcat
Summary: Karin is recruited to help save Itachi with her “abilities.” It goes less than well. (Drabble).
Relationships: Karin/Uchiha Itachi
Series: Assorted Tumblr and Discord Drabbles [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1185275
Comments: 5
Kudos: 23
Collections: Naruto Rare Pair Haven





	kant’s theory of utilitarianism

**Author's Note:**

  * For [cherryberry12](https://archiveofourown.org/users/cherryberry12/gifts).



“Bite me, Uchiha.”

Red falls down around his face, tickling tired creases and too-sallow skin, pinched pink into a healthy blush. With his fair tones, muted eyes, and long black hair feathered over the green pillow, it’s easy to see how Uchiha Itachi could be good looking—if, perhaps, the world were not so cruel, his life so hard, his breath so short.

Admittedly, the latter might not be so bad if Karin wasn’t sitting on his chest, thighs bouncing around his head.

“I said, fucking bite me Uchiha.” Karin pinches his cheek again. “Hello? Earth to weasel boy! Are you even listening?”

Itachi stares resolutely at the ceiling.

“This is not my kink,” he firmly answers. An obvious virgin, in denial. Not cute at all. Really.

She pokes him with a manicured nail. “Good! Cause this ain’t supposed to be sexy.”

Itachi shifts, glancing at the closed privacy curtain. When he meets her eyes, they’re a flat black, dark as the ink in those types of ukiyo-e paintings.

Y’know. The porny ones.

“The lifted skirt at my throat begs to differ,” he steadily replies.

“……” Karin blinks. Then, looking down at their position—her stomach nearly kissing his nose, her thighs around his head, the warm puffs of air on her _BUSINESS_ —she turns redder than her hair.

“Aah?! No, no, no, you got it all wrong!” She pinches his cheek again. Stupid Uchiha! Stupid, dumb, would-be pretty, Uchiha! “This is medical! _Medical!_ You hear me?! Huh! Huh! Huh!? As if I would, would—ugh!” She pinches his other cheek, twisting his face in weird shapes. Never mind that he’s a patient! “What kind of lady do you take me for, hm?”

Karin finally releases him, steam billowing from her ears. Irritated, she flicks off her foggy glasses, cleaning them with her shirt. “Honestly…”

Itachi waits until she’s done muttering. “A well-intentioned one,” he answers, face red from the manhandling.

It’s the most alive he’s looked in ages.

Karin sighs, pushing her glasses up with two fingers. “What do you take me for, hm…” she repeats, rocking side to side. Does it look like she has time for this? No! “Just—just, hurry up, okay?”

She crosses her arms, braces herself, and waits.

“I refuse.”

 _Finally_ , Karin exhales.

Wait. What?

“I won’t do it,” Itachi says, quietly. Not if she dislikes it. Not even for his life.

Karin grits her teeth. Then, abruptly, she swings her leg over the side of the bed, skirt swishing.

“Whatever.” She blows her bangs out of her face. _Fucking Itachi. Think you’re better than me? Get the fuck over yourself._

“Die then. See if I care.”

With that, Karin turns on her heel, storming out of the hospital room. Tsunade will be pissed. Sakura too. And Sasuke. And fuck them! Fuck this! She offered and he said no, so what the hell can she do about it, hmm? Nothing! Nothing. Useless… again.

“Whatever,” she huffs, rubbing her eyes.

She does _not_ care.

She doesn’t.


End file.
